“Are you ashamed of me, because I’m an Officer?” The question caught me off-guard. My heart sank. I just finished telling my husband about the wonderful posts on the Black Military Wives Facebook page, where many wives were celebrating their husbands’ promotions. “What?! I’m very proud of you!” He smirked at my claim, and said,
Hi! I’m Jamilah! I’ve been a Navy wife since 2006, after earning my Masters in Marriage & Family Therapy from San Diego State University. After relocating to other areas, I longed for a sense of community and resources–hence, I created Black Military wives! The goal of Black Military Wives (B.M.W.) is to create relationships between women who share similar cultural and family experiences, in relation to the military. B.M.W. also has a Facebook Group, which was established in January, 2016. The group now has more than 8,000 members–even though it’s a “secret” group! At the time of its creations, there wasn’t any other worldwide “Black Military Wives…” anything! Now, there are so many resources available to our community! Together, we are making a remarkable difference in building friendships and sharing resources between sisters all over the world, and I’m so thankful to be apart of this amazing sisterhood.
Support. Encouragement. Trust. - Get S.E.T.
When someone says that his/her spouse is deployed, my empathy immediately goes out to the person left behind while also praying for their spouse’s safety. When it comes to the spouses who are counting down the days, I understand how challenging it is to be without their loved ones, especially if you’re raising children without additional support.
As a child, I didn’t have many Birthday parties. No, we weren’t Jehovah’s Witnesses. We–my siblings and I–just didn’t have many Birthday parties. As a pre-teen, I was in the Big Brother & Sister program, and was given an amazing “Big Sister” named Ada. Ada gave me my first Birthday party–she planned all of my Birthday parties, as a child, actually.
Earlier in the relationship, you were probably more risky. Boundless intimacy on the patio while the neighbors in the adjacent apartment building could look on–if they just happened to walk outside–made your heart race. Making love in the Caribbean’s clear waters as others laughed and splashed around–completely oblivious of the pure bliss that transpired only 50ft away–felt surreal. And,
Have you heard the saying, “Don’t tell me what they said about me. But, tell me why they were so comfortable telling you?” Most people would agree that trust is important. Even among criminals, trust is an intricate part of how they plan their next move with their fellow racketeers.Credence is essential, not only for
ALL healthy military matrimonies are beautiful! But, it’s the non-traditional unions in the “Black military Wives” Facebook group that recently captured my attention; these marriages are taking their gumption to new heights. Lately, I’ve seen more and more Black women married to non-Black men. Some of the wives in the group actually also have wives! The most common thread within the large amount of unexpected military